So I'm wondering do women fall for qualifications and the pre-emptive future or for the person they are dating? Every woman has a two lists:
1. Physical attributes
2. Professional potential

Is he attractive? Does he have good teeth? Is he showing signs of age? Does he take care of his body? What would our children look like?

or Does he have a job? Is he educated? What's his work ethic? How does his future look? What are his values and morals like? Is he ambitious?

But when the two don't mesh are more women apt to settle for one or the other?
He's attractive to her (maybe not everyone) and she's okay with that. He has a job and makes ends meet. He shows few signs of aging. He's not as physically active as he could be. And his future is stable with little room for growth.

Where does all of this apply to myself? I've been accused of being too picky.
If he doesn't take care of his body now for himself, (Like going to the doctor if he's sick or eating right) Why would he be inclined to do it later? If he doesn't treat himself to things he likes now, why would he choose to treat me as his significant other or wife? If he doesn't care to excel or get a better job and settles for mediocre in the now, why would he do it for the sake of actual living expenses? ie a house, children, retirement, or vacations. These are all things I do myself. So why tilt the scale?
All plausible questions. However, In my experiences I've come across my dream plenty of times. The downfall is that these men have it all figured out and seem to be control freaks. What gives?
The total opposite of the black women I come across who " Don't need a man for anything".
I feel like I'm stuck in limbo. Hence, the rollercoaster of a almost 30 SBF. I was in a relationship with a man 16 years my senior. We are both still so smitten with each other. But he felt the need to make my choices for me and not let me choose what I will and won't live with. There are no mitigating circumstances other than he didn't want to me to have to deal with his baggage. And he would talk as if i were just out of highschool, naive to the world, and inexperienced. Very irritating.
So in closing I will keep with my standards because logically it makes sense to want someone who lives along the same line as myself, and admit everyone has baggage in some form. You never know why people choose against. But you accept it and love them for who they are and not what you think they could be. I am, and I love. Ready for someone who compliments the life I have built for myself.